Random parenting thoughts today

I love it when I read scripture and a short passage or even a word jumps out at me and I have to camp out there awhile. Here's the verse that I read today, and see if you see the same word I did. 

"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deut. 6:6, 7

DILIGENTLY. I looked it up. Miriam Webster. "characterized by steady, earnest, and energetic effort, painstaking" And it further said, "You're more likely to be diligent about something if you love doing it... affection can lead to energetic effort... it descends from Latin, 'to value or esteem highly' or 'to love'".

I am closer to the end of parenting than the beginning. Yes, I know I will always be a parent, and my kids will always need me. But the time they are at home is running short. So my immediate feeling when I read that was guilt and regret. Was I diligent in teaching my kids about God and his commands? I am a perfectionist in many ways, so I would say no, I did not do enough. But if you have met my kids, you would say they are great, and they are. And they love Jesus. 

Did I and my husband give steady, earnest and energic effort to teaching our kids God's commands? I suppose if I didn't love my kids as much as I do, then I wouldn't feel that regret. But I can't go back and redo it. I have to trust that the time and energy we put in was enough, and trust that they are in the Savior's hands. He doesn't really NEED me to pour into my kids. Its an honor and privilege to partner with God in that job. And I can pray that what has been poured into them will blossom and grow, and their love of Jesus and his word will grow. 

As my kids move up and out of the house, my job changes. I will still need to be diligent, but it will look different. I need to start rethinking what it will look like. It will change from daily conversations with my kids about God, to daily conversations with God about my kids. Energetic effort. 

May we all let go of the guilt of what we think we didn't do, and move forward with energic effort, steady and diligent love for our kids! 

Following a Cloud!

I love reading the book of Exodus! So many amazing stories of God's power and guidance. I was reading the story of the parting of the Red Sea the other day in chapter 14, a story I have read and heard maybe hundreds of times since I was a child, but this time it seemed so fresh and new to me. Can you really imagine what that looked like, smelled like, felt like? 

It says that God took them a round about way because he knew they would be scared of the enemies in the promised land, and he knew that his people were not ready for that yet. So he put them by the sea and then the enemy comes to them. God knew what He was going to do! He wanted to show them His power. He was already leading them as a cloud by day and fire by night. And he stops and here comes Pharaoh's army. And Moses tells his people "Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which He will work for you today... The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent." (13, 14)  How often do try to fight my own battles instead of being silent and letting Him do it. It always works out much better that way!

His pillar of cloud moved from in front of them to behind them to hem them in, protect them as he opened up the sea and they walked through. And when they were all through it, he let the water go and not one of Pharaoh's men survived. So thankful for His protection!

God reminded me with the picture of the cloud by day and fire by night, that He doesn't need a break from leading and protecting me. He doesn't sleep or need a "me day". He is always there leading me. "He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. " Psalm 121;3, 4

Moses sings a song in chapter 15, "The Lord is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation, this is my God and I will praise him, my father's god and I will exalt him. You have led in your steadfast love the people whom you have redeemed; you have guided them by your strength to your holy abode." (15:2, 13) I am guided by HIS STRENGTH, not my own. 

I pray for God to continue to lead me and my family, to  hem us in with His protection, to remind me to be still and wait for his plan to unfold as He opens up the waters in front of us to lead us to a promised land! Amen!

He Changed My Name

I accepted Christ as my Savior when I was 8 years old in church on a Sunday morning. I remember going up during the invitation, and I hadn't asked my parents about it that I can remember. We went back into the choir room with a counselor, and she talked to me about accepting Christ, and I was ready. She prayed a prayer and I repeated her words. I remember weeping, which as an 8 year old I think says something. I knew what I was doing was a big deal. 

I have lived a fairly good, clean life since then. There have been times when I was jealous of people who had a more flashy testimony, God bringing them out of a sinful life and changing their lives in a dramatic way. I have had times when I felt like I needed to do things to prove to God that He made the right decision in saving me. I now know that being saved young was a gift and blessing in that He had a hold of me young and kept me from doing some of those destructive things. I know that I don't have to do anything to prove to him that I'm good enough. He loves me regardless.

I do take for granted though that I am a sinner saved by grace. I don't really feel convicted of my sin often enough. I don't show gratitude enough to God for saving me and what Jesus did on the cross. But there are two songs out right now that when they come on, I get a tear in my eye and praise the Lord for what He has done for me, not just the blessings but for saving me from my sins! I get choked up thinking how I did not deserve what He did for me. We don't deserve Jesus dying on the cross for us. He did it just because He loves us and wanted to be back in communion with us, His creation. So listen to them, and thank Him for dying for us. I have a new name and the enemy can't change it back! I am chosen, loved, and forgiven!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrSh2xtZHdQ  Matthew West "You Changed My Name"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euUYX-jss5Y Mercy Me "Then Christ Came"

Influence

I have started a new Bible reading plan that will take me through the Bible in two years, but it goes back and forth from the Old to the New Testament. I like that because I don't want to ignore one or the other for a year at a time and its a good pace for me so I can take the time to journal, and sometimes blog, on what I am reading.

Today I read John 1, which I just read back in November, and yet I got something new out of it today. Thank you Lord that your word is living and active. In John 1, John the Baptist is basically introducing Jesus to the people around him. He has been prepping them for a long time that Jesus was coming, and now he's here. I can't imagine how excited John was! At one point, he says in front of two of his own disciples "Look, the lamb of God!" and one of his disciples, who turns out to be Andrew, leaves John to follow Jesus. We have to hope that made John really excited and proud, not jealous or sad to see Andrew leave. 

Andrew goes and tells his brother Simon first about meeting Jesus, and brings Simon to Jesus who immediately names him Peter, and we know that Peter ends up being one of the most influential disciples, and is known as the founder of the Church. So John tells Andrew, Andrew tells Peter, and Peter changes the world. John's influence can still be seen in the church today because he introduced people to Jesus, that was his calling.

The next day Jesus finds Philip and asks him to follow him. Philip gets his friend Nathanael and he follows Jesus too. Philip was from the same town as Andrew and Peter. We don't know that they were friends necessarily, but I think we can at least assume they knew of each other. And I was thinking that Philip and Nathanael's opinions of Andrew and Peter had to have had some influence on their decision to follow Jesus as well. If they had not liked them at all, if they had had a crazy reputation in town or had had a history of bad decisions, they might would have had to question whether or not they were going to join them on this adventure with this teacher. And may have had to think about whether or not Jesus was someone worth following if these other two dudes were going to follow him. I can think of a few people that I would not want to join in their adventures because I have seen choices they have made before. 

Its all about influence. . John influenced so many people, including Andrew. Andrew had an influence over Simon Peter. Philip had an influence over Nathanael. Possibly Andrew and Peter had some influence over Philip and Nathanael, even if they didn't know it. 

The term "influencer" is all over the place now on social media. I don't want to be that kind, but what kind of influence do I have over people? Would they trust me if I told them about Jesus that they would believe me because of what they have seen me say and do, the choices I have made? Who is in my circle of influence? Who sees me and hears me and is in relationship with me enough to be willing to follow me as I follow after Christ? And I have to remember that I am probably influencing people that I don't even know about. And remember that my influence may last long after I am gone. 

Who are you influencing?