I love it when I read scripture and a short passage or even a word jumps out at me and I have to camp out there awhile. Here's the verse that I read today, and see if you see the same word I did.
"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deut. 6:6, 7
DILIGENTLY. I looked it up. Miriam Webster. "characterized by steady, earnest, and energetic effort, painstaking" And it further said, "You're more likely to be diligent about something if you love doing it... affection can lead to energetic effort... it descends from Latin, 'to value or esteem highly' or 'to love'".
I am closer to the end of parenting than the beginning. Yes, I know I will always be a parent, and my kids will always need me. But the time they are at home is running short. So my immediate feeling when I read that was guilt and regret. Was I diligent in teaching my kids about God and his commands? I am a perfectionist in many ways, so I would say no, I did not do enough. But if you have met my kids, you would say they are great, and they are. And they love Jesus.
Did I and my husband give steady, earnest and energic effort to teaching our kids God's commands? I suppose if I didn't love my kids as much as I do, then I wouldn't feel that regret. But I can't go back and redo it. I have to trust that the time and energy we put in was enough, and trust that they are in the Savior's hands. He doesn't really NEED me to pour into my kids. Its an honor and privilege to partner with God in that job. And I can pray that what has been poured into them will blossom and grow, and their love of Jesus and his word will grow.
As my kids move up and out of the house, my job changes. I will still need to be diligent, but it will look different. I need to start rethinking what it will look like. It will change from daily conversations with my kids about God, to daily conversations with God about my kids. Energetic effort.
May we all let go of the guilt of what we think we didn't do, and move forward with energic effort, steady and diligent love for our kids!
