Since I started reading "Made to Crave" with some other teachers at church, and changed the way I eat, hence the "lifestyle change" as opposed to a diet, I have lost 9 1/2 pounds! The Thursday before Thanksgiving I got my first "Are you losing weight?" question, and I was on cloud nine! Made my week! I told her she was the first person to notice, but I was informed that I was the topic of conversation around the water cooler. Why would I need to lose weight? While that is a compliment in itself, I do have my reasons.
One, because half the clothes in my closet haven't fit in many years and I don't want to, nor have money to, go buy new. (Of course, I mentioned to my hubby that now the other half of the closet, the big clothes, don't fit. He said big clothes still fit, just cinch up my belt!) Two, I was eating WAY too much sugar, and mostly for emotional reasons. I would reach for chocolate, or ice cream, or anything sweet I could dig up any time I was lonely, tired, or stressed. I would reward myself with sweets for making it through a hard day or to reward myself for making it through a really good day. I didn't need a reason. When I started this, the first two weeks were torture, and then not so bad. I took a bad detour after the Halloween candy came into the house, but got over that hump. And then last week was bad with anything pumpkin, pie or bread, it didn't matter. But I would catch myself and ask why I was eating it. I usually ate it anyway, but at least I asked myself why. Mostly, I just love pumpkin stuff.
But the main reason I started losing weight was because I just felt gross. I hated looking in the mirror. I was depressed getting dressed in the morning. I was upset with myself for getting this way. When I started this, I was only 3 pounds away from what I weighed when I gave birth to Cooper. Ridiculous! I gained 30 pounds with each child, and like to tell people that I only lost 20 after each. But that's not true. With Cooper I only lost 20, but with the other two, I lost all of it. I just gained 10 back in the next years from emotional eating. I want to lose 7 more. That will put me back to pre-Cade weight. I don't want to get back to pre-Cooper. I don't need that 27 year old too skinny body back. She was annoyingly skinny!
When I'm doing well on my plan, eating more vegetables, less sugar, and more water, I feel better and look better. No stomach issues, my face is clearer, and I feel more confident. I tried on a shirt yesterday that I had bought years ago a little too tight, and have never worn, and it fit! I was so excited! I'm on my last hole on my belt, and it will feel so good to go buy another one.
Don't get me wrong. It has not been easy. I told a friend that I wanted to look at the Snickers bars in the Halloween basket as an evil monster, and maybe that would stop me from eating it, but I realized I wasn't even waiting the ten seconds to have that thought. I saw it and ate it. There was no thought process. I'm getting better at it. Its really not about losing weight. Its about making wise choices and asking God for help. I really recommend "Made to Crave". Lysa makes it a spiritual journey, and that's what I need. Imagine if I was really going all in and exercising on a regular basis and asking God for help every moment of the day. I'm not trying to brag here (although I am proud of myself), I am hoping to encourage you. You can do it too!